Does Not Follow
by Kadunta
Summary: A reuploaded dead fic. A senseless fic where wrong conclusions abound. A romance-starved young old maid goes Kuno when she sees something straight out from a fairytale. Special ingredients for now Brothers Grimm and H.C. Andersen.
1. Chapter 1

_**Author's Warning**: Want coherent stories and characters acting in character? Then don't bother reading any further. That's what the title refers to - "non sequitur" is the catchword for everyone in this fic. Don't take this fic seriously, I sure didn't when I wrote it - it hasn't been through any self-censorship filters and plotholes were purposefully ignored. Leave your logic and reasoning by the door next to mine._

_I can't and I won't deny the obvious influence of Ozzallos's fics... Cabbit Days in particular. Too bad the quality didn't make the transfer as well ;)_

_**Reupload note**: With the exception of this note and a few typo corrections, this is unedited reupload of the story from 2006. It is very unlikely that the story will be continued past the second chapter for several reasons.  
_

* * *

Disclaimer. No anime/manga series and the characters therein are mine, have ever been mine or will ever be mine. Same applies to any other work of literary art the story refers to. This is a non-profit work of fiction.

* * *

Once upon a time in China there was a place called Jusenkyo - the valley of sorrow and the stage for many very very terrible tragedies invariably involving drowning. That day a slightly different tragedy took place at the cursed springs. Two travelling martial artists from Japan, Ranma and Genma Saotome, had come to the springs for the final leg of their journey before returning back to Japan.

Not long after the two had begun sparring on the bamboo poles rising from the springs below them, Ranma scored a good hit, sending Genma flying into a spring with a splash.

"Can't ya do any better than that, Pops?"

As Ranma was gloating over his apparent triumph, the surface of the spring broke as Genma jumped back on a bamboo pole. A second later, another Genma burst from the water.

For a second, Ranma wondered if Pops had again spiked his food. He usually didn't suffer from double vision, except when Pops had managed to hit him squarely in the face. Then again, in that case, both Genmas in his vision should be clad, but now only the other one wore a gi. Whatever the reasons might've been, this silent moment of contemplation was a bad, bad thing, as the nude Genma managed to kick Ranma in the stomach, making him fall off the bamboo poles and fall into a spring below.

As the surface of the spring became still, nothing was heard. The Chinese guide to the springs came running from the distance.

"Misters Customer fall in the Spring of Drowned Twins! Very very tragic story of twins who drowned in the spring waters!"

Only now did the Genmas notice there were two of them. The two stared at each other in silent admiration for a while before the waters of the spring where Ranma had fallen stirred again. Ranma, in his new form, leaped from the spring onto the grass with ease.

"Ribbit!"

"Mister Customer fall in the Spring of Drowned Frog. Oh, the terrible tragedy of the frog that drowned in the spring fifteen days ago."

The guide hastily offered one of his old uniforms to the nude Genma before picking up the small frog that was then trying to wriggle his way out of the guide's hands. To the guide's luck, the boy-turned-frog had forgotten how fast and long a frog could leap. Also for the benefit of both Genmas and the guide, the tongue of the frog did not hurt when it hit them in the face. Unless it hit them in the eye, as the gi-clad Genma found out.

"How do you know a frog drowned there?" the Genma in the uniform asked.

"Each spring curses who fall in to take the form of the creature to drown there. Many many lemmings swarm the valley one week ago. Many many frogs come up from that pond. Many many new Springs of Drowned Lemmings," the guide replied, before taking the three to his shack to explain how the curses worked.

* * *

It was a Sunday morning in Nerima. In the family room of his house, Soun Tendo looked outside the window, holding in his hand the postcard his old friend Genma Saotome had sent. He hoped that if the two were arriving today as the postcard said they wouldn't catch cold from the rain outside. He had just told her daughters that Genma and his son Ranma would be coming soon and of the pact to join the two families.

A knock sounded on the door, followed with the soft sound of Kasumi's feet shuffling towards the door. "Father, it's for you," her voice called to him.

"Nabiki, Akane! Come down here!" he called as he walked to meet the guests at the front door.

"Kasumi, won't you be a dear and go get your sisters into the family room?" he asked of his eldest daughter, standing beside the guests.

"Soun!" the two guests hollered.

"Genma!" Soun began, then blinked after getting a better look at the two. Two identical men, the only difference being that one had a white gi whereas the other had a dirty white gi, and that the one with a dirty gi held in his hand an unconscious frog by his legs.

"Please, come into the family room. My daughters are there expecting you."

The three daughters had already sat down on one side of the table in the order dictated by their age. Nabiki had put on her best kimono, Kasumi was in her plain housedress and Akane had not changed out of her training gi just because of a potential fiancé. Soun sat down at the end of the table closer to Kasumi whereas the guests sat down opposite to the three girls.

"Genma, I can see where your son got your looks. Uhm... even to the degree I can't tell which one is you, Genma?" Soun started.

The two youngest Tendo daughters did a spit take. Were they engaged to one of these bald old men? The oldest just kept the smile on her face.

Genmas looked at each others before the one holding the now conscious frog raised it above the table. "Sorry, old buddy, this here is my son."

Soun leaned in closer to look at the frog in the dirty-gi Genma's hand. "Ribbit!" Ranma croaked in disapprovement and swatted Soun on the nose with his long tongue. For the senior martial arts master, this was too much and his brain decided a brief timeout would be most welcome.

"Oh my," Kasumi said.

"It's a toad!" Nabiki exclaimed in disgust.

Akane was now laughing at Nabiki. "And you wore your formal kimono to impress the fiancé Daddy arranged us?"

Nabiki lashed back at her with her sharp tongue. "Well, little miss princess, maybe you should kiss him to see if he turns into a prince?"

The youngest Tendo blanched for a second before her face took a bright red hue - as did the air around her. "I hate boys! And I am not going to kiss - of all things - a frog!"

Meanwhile, Nabiki's comment had sent Kasumi into the la-la land with cotton candy clouds and trees made of licorice. She was sitting by a duck pond on a bench, a golden tiara on her forehead and a frilly creamy white dress, decorated with pink hearts, flowing down her body. Her hands, inside white elbow-length silk gloves, held a red velvet pillow. And on top of the pillow sat a frog; a frog wearing a small crown on top of his head.

"Ribbit! Ribbit!" the cursed prince said to Kasumi.

"Oh my, but isn't that a bit improper?" she replied.

"Ribbit!" the frog said with conviction.

"But how can I trust you with my first kiss?" Kasumi said and turned her head sideways, a gentle blush adorning her cheeks.

"Ribbit. Ribbit," the frog croaked, but now with a lot less life in its voice.

"Please, Mr. Frog, I'm a princess!"

"Rib-bbiiiiiit?" Somehow, the frog had managed the puppy-dog eyes technique, striking through every mental defense Kasumi had.

She lifted the frog to her eye level, took a good look at the frog and gave him a light peck on the mouth. In a cloud of smoke, the frog disappeared. As the smoke dissipated, she saw that on her lap now sat a handsome prince clad in gold-embroidered kimono.

The prince stood up and took hold of Kasumi's hand. With the piercing blue eyes fixed on Kasumi's he proclaimed, "My fairest princess, I thank you for removing the foul curse the evil witch of Western Lands had laid upon my personage. Come hither, and let us go see the minister together so that minstrels shall sing of our eternal love long after our great-grandchildren have passed onto greener pastures."

* * *

When Kasumi returned back to the real world, Nabiki and Akane were still fighting with words.

"Mr. Saotome," Kasumi began, "is this frog really a boy?"

Both Genmas nodded. Kasumi blushed before speaking her mind. "If he does turn into a boy, I'd want to be his fiancée." How could she not take this chance - a slice of magical life for the romance-starved young old maid?

This brought the bickering between the two sisters into a halt as they fixed their incredulous eyes on Kasumi and the frog, whose eyes seemed to be bulging even more than is common for a frog.

Soun, who had by now returned amongst the living, looked at the two men next to him.

"Genma? Why is my daughter now engaged to a frog? Where did I go wrong?" Cue the waterworks.

Understanding lit up on Genmas' faces.

"Soun, old buddy, if you have some hot water, we can explain this."

"Kasumi, if you could?" Soun asked her daughter, who then left to the kitchen to get the requested water.

* * *

While Kasumi was gone, Genmas briefly explained the training trip they had taken to Soun, Nabiki and Akane. Soon enough Kasumi returned with a tea kettle filled with hot water. After white-gi Genma had first demonstrated how the hot water temporarily cured the curse on himself, he gave the kettle back to Kasumi and motioned her to do the same to the frog, whom Genma had by now set down on the floor beside him on a cushion. 'And I washed that only yesterday,' Kasumi lamented in her mind.

Kasumi poured some hot water onto Ranma. Her eyes widened as the small frog changed into a tall boy with wide shoulders and sculpted muscles. A boy that was completely naked. "Oh my!" she squeaked before she understood to turn away to give Ranma some minuscule privacy. Nabiki opted to let her mouth hang open even after Akane had closed hers and begun screaming about perverts corrupting her sisters and stomped to the dojo to cool off breaking a few bricks after smashing the table on Ranma's head.

* * *

Fifteen bricks later when Ranma was again decent, the girls were called back to the family room. There was no mistaking the hostile glare in Akane's eyes, directed at the now gi-clad pigtailed martial artist. Nabiki had an unreadable expression on her face, probably because she herself had no real idea what to think of the situation. However, both did understand two things. First of all, their sister had to be liberated from the engagement to the amphibian. Second, they owed their sister big time for taking the engagement at their stead.

"Pops, what's this talk about an engagement?" Ranma demanded.

"It's for the future of Anything Goes martial arts, boy! My old training buddy Soun and I made the pact to join our families before you were even born."

"Ya gotta be kidding! Who in their right state of mind would want ta marry a part-time frog!"

Kasumi raised uncertainly her hand with a shy smile.

Genma, who had missed Kasumi's gesture, threw the boy into the koi pond outside. The small frog leaped out of the pond, leaving the koi a gi to wonder.

"Ribbit!"

Kasumi frowned. 'No, this is most improper. The prince never changed to a frog for the second time.' She tightened her hands into little fists in her lap, took a stern expression and snapped her chin upwards. 'I shall live a life fit for a fairytale and get my magical prince, so swears I, Kasumi Tendo!'

Her sisters shared a worried glance when they saw Kasumi's expression shift from disapproval to determination and from there on back to the smile of a space cadet.

* * *

Two hours later Kasumi looked at the frog now sitting on her desk. In the stories, the prince didn't changed back into a frog, but the two lived happily ever after. No, this was certainly not acceptable.

"Ribbit?"

"Oh, I'm sorry Ranma... I was just thinking if your curse could be lifted."

"Ribbit!" the frog croaked a upbeat reply.

"Well, I'm sure that we can do it, if we just look in the right places!" She just couldn't admit her magical marriage was not going to happen. Magical... this gave her an epiphany.

"You know Ranma, on the market I talk with other housewives about the recent events in Tokyo." This, of course, was an euphemism. In reality, the market was the one true place for gossip mongers. With whom did Mrs. Sakamoto cheat on her husband? Were the Sailor Senshi in reality the daughters of the Emperor?

"I hear that there are real magical girls in Juuban, and with all the evil demons and youma there, the temples in there surely must be well-equipped to handle them!" she gushed. "I'm sure they could be of help to us, don't you think so too, Ranma?"

The frog lowered his head and tried to cover his eyes with his front legs.

* * *

"Good day, shrine maiden," Kasumi politely bowed to a young shrine maiden sweeping the stairs in a hurry. The shrine maiden stopped and bowed back to Kasumi.

"I am Kasumi Tendo, and my fiancé Ranma Saotome, here," she patted frog-Ranma on his head, "is cursed to become a frog. Most annoying obstacle for our life together, wouldn't you agree?"

Rei Hino, a 14-year-old shrine maiden at Hikawa Shrine in Juuban, stared at the 19-year-old woman in front of her. Her grandfather had told her to finish sweeping the shrine stairs before she could get back to talk with her friends. The vacuous smile on the woman's face was somewhat unnerving, but even worse was the way she carried a frog in a purse, his head peeking over its walls. The said frog nodded his head at Rei and croaked.

"Yes," Rei answered. She was not a stranger to magic, given her double life both as a shrine maiden and Sailor Mars. But whereas the senshis were real and there certainly was nothing fairytale-like of them, surely a frog who in reality was a boy must've been just a figment of overactive imagination after reading too many Western fairytales.

Rei was thinking. She had had premonitions that the Moon Princess was in reality Usagi, but this didn't sit well with her. She couldn't believe, no, she refused to believe that Usagi was the Moon Princess and she had already taken measures to prove this was not the case. For instance, the last time they had a sleepover at the shrine, she had placed twenty mattresses on the floor on top of each other and a single pea under the two bottommost ones. Then, she asked Usagi to sleep on top of the pile. If she was a true princess, she shouldn't have been able to sleep at all for the whole night.

When Rei had woken up and seen Usagi snoring atop the mattresses, she had been absolutely confident she had now proven to the senshi that Usagi couldn't have been the Moon Princess. Until shortly after Usagi had woken up, that is.

Rei pulled out the two bottom mattresses and searched for the pea between them.

"Rei, what are you looking for?" Usagi asked.

"There was a pea between these two mattresses. Now where did it go?"

"Oh that one? Well, I was hungry and I just _knew_ there was something down there for me to eat -"

"- so you just ate it," Rei finished with a groan.

"_sniffle_ I was not supposed to?"

Well, that plan was foiled. But now, it was the time and opportunity for another plan.

"... so we would be highly grateful if your temple could help us cure him of his curse?" Kasumi had continued speaking when Rei had been buried in her memories.

'If a princess can change a frog into a prince... they might believe that if anyone then the Moon Princess should be the one to do that,' Rei reasoned. And if the woman happened to believe the frog really was a boy, it only made the show more convincing.

"Could you please come with me to see some of my friends?" Rei said before she grabbed Kasumi's hand and escorted her inside the temple to meet Usagi and Makoto. Ami had a caught a cold and was at home, bedridden.

The lively discussion had ended abruptly as the group warily eyed the unknown brunette whom Rei seated at the table, petting a frog on her hand. After the brief introductions were over with, the only sound present was more or less the buzzing of a fly going in circles inside the room.

Snag.

"Ranma, you really shouldn't ruin your appetite with snacks," Kasumi admonished the frog who had the wisdom to look a bit ashamed of himself.

"Ribbit."

The senshis wondered how exactly did the frog manage to convey with his croaks such obvious feelings of regret.

"So, Ms. Tendo, could you please tell us of your fiancé?" Rei prompted Kasumi to get the meeting back on track she wanted it to take.

* * *

"... and to join the families, I am now betrothed to Ranma here," Kasumi finished her brief explanation of the situation.

"Ribbit! Ribbit!" Ranma was agitated - the incy-wincy detail of the water trigger had apparently escaped her mind in whole.

"So, wouldn't you agree that if Usagi here was a princess, her kiss would remove the curse?" Rei asked.

"Oh yes, but -" Kasumi said before Rei stopped her from telling more.

Makoto was wondering if Rei had read too many romance mangas. Usagi briefly wondered if she had better leave Rei's mangas alone in the future. All three were a bit uneasy before Kasumi's vacant expression.

"May I?" Rei asked of Kasumi, gesturing towards Ranma, who appeared a bit paler than a while ago.

Uncertain of Rei's intentions, Kasumi agreed with a little hesitation. Rei took hold of the frog with both of her hands and looked sharply at Usagi, whose ponytails stood up on end as she realized what Rei was asking for.

She really didn't like this idea, but if this was going to possibly help the boy and also placate Rei a little... She braced herself and moved next to the frog, which tried frantically to squirm his way away from Rei's hands. A deep breath and...

Smooch.

The frog tensed up before going completely limp. Kasumi nodded with approval. It was not right for her betrothed to enjoy being kissed by other women... especially if they were just junior high girls.

Silently Rei handed the limp Ranma back to Kasumi before standing up, a wide smile on her face. "I'll go get something for us to drink," she said and skipped giddily out of the room. As long as none of the other girls got the idea to kiss the frog the scheme would work out just wonderfully.

Only then did Kasumi remember she herself hadn't kissed her prince yet in either form or that she hadn't even told the shrine maiden how the curse was triggered. The latter would have to wait until Rei returned, but the former she could do right now. And oh, how wonderful it would be if he really turned back into a boy as she kissed him, just like in the fairy tale?

Rei returned back to the room with four cups on a platter. "Here is some teAAAAAGH!" she finished with a scream as she slipped on one of the mangas Usagi had left on the floor after reading them when Rei was sweeping the stairs.

Just as Kasumi's lips touched Ranma's, the water magnet frog was doused in hot tea.

Usagi and Makoto were staring at the woman kissing the unconscious frog-turned-hunk before them. Rei was getting up from the ground. She'd have to clean the floor quickly lest the tea stain it and her mangas. Then she noticed the boy in Kasumi's embrace and mentally yelled all the different expletives quite unfit for a shrine maiden to utter, especially in a shrine.

Foiled, yet again. Marvellously.

Kasumi beamed; she was as close to heaven as she had ever been.. The navigators aboard ships over at Tokyo Bay decided it was safest not to make a move until the fog cleared and the location of the new, most unexpected lighthouse was marked on the charts.

Usagi's eyes were sparkling with tears now that she realized she had kissed someone else than Tuxedo Kamen. Both she and Makoto had the same thought on their minds:

"Could Ms. Tendo be the Moon Princess?"

* * *

_**AN**. In case you wondered, the mess with the mattresses refers to H.C. Andersen's "The Princess and the Pea"._

_Where's Minako? She hasn't made her appearance yet at this point._

_By the way, I just lied to you about the lemmings. _


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer. No anime/manga series and the characters therein are mine, have ever been mine or will ever be mine. Same applies to any other work of literary art the story refers to. This is a non-profit work of fiction.

* * *

_**AW:**And the OoC warning still holds. In other news, Kasumi got her brain implant whereas the rest are still recuperating from their lobotomy. Char bashing? Probably more than a little in there. Writer's condescending attitude? Unfortunately that, too. And if your suspension of disbelief isn't shot to pieces after this chapter... get help._

* * *

Luna felt like there should be an ominous thunderstrike coming anytime now. Unfortunately, she wasn't in any position to do anything right now. Two days ago Usagi had - again - tripped on her way downstairs. Even though cats can fall from high without breaking bones, that doesn't hold true when someone falls on a cat. Owie.

It was of paramount importance that they find the Moon Princess and thwart the plans of Beryl and Metallia, and now she, the advisor to the four teenage girls with enough power to flatten a suburb on a whim, was out of the picture. Ami was sick too, right? Not really so sick she'd be delirious, but feverish anyway... which meant that Rei, Usagi and Makoto were alone in their meeting and her communicator was ... lost somewhere after Usagi's mother decided to clean up Usagi's room and put the items on their right places, which were the wrong places for the two defenders of love and justice.

She looked at the ceiling. 'It's just one meeting. Surely nothing that bad can happen. Right?' At this point she heard the thunder rumble in the distance. 'Shouldn't have thought that...'

* * *

Makoto and Usagi had pulled Rei aside when Kasumi was covering Ranma in another room, sharing their suspicions that Kasumi might be the Moon Princess they had been searching for. Rei felt torn between slapping the girls to their senses and congratulating them. Sure, they thought someone else than Usagi was the princess but was this even worse? And was she the princess they'd been looking for? Whatever the case might be, she did understand blabbering the senshi secrets to every suspect was not a good idea.

"We'll have to first find out whether she's the princess at all," Rei stated.

"Luna will know that!" Usagi practically yelled in triumph before being dogpiled by the other two.

"Keep your voice down, meatball head!"

The lower lip of the addressed girl began to quiver, but a mouthful of cookies from the tabletop, courtesy of Makoto, prevented the outburst.

"What if she is?" Makoto replied. "The Dark Kingdom might send their youmas after her if they even suspect she is."

"Mphe fudd fwafl fhew," Usagi mumbled, her mouth still full of chocolate chip cookies.

"Empty your mouth before speaking," Makoto urged Usagi.

"_gulp_ We should trail her." The second try was a lot more easier to understand and was received with nods from both Rei and Makoto.

"But who's going to do that now that Luna's pretty much stuck indoors?" Makoto asked.

Two pairs of eyes focused on her. "Ehh... guys?"

"I have to stay here at the shrine."

"I... I have to take care of Luna!" The reason why Luna had to be taken care of in the first place was conveniently ignored by the young blonde.

Makoto's shoulders slumped. "Fine, just give me the disguise pen."

"Eheheh... about that..." Usagi began, nervously scratching the back of her head. The other two senshi turned to look at her, Rei with considerably less friendly expression on her face than Makoto.

"," she finally blurted out.

* * *

Ranma had woken up to hear a muted discussion in the room next to the one he was lying in. Yes, he was still at the shrine but in a different room than where he had been. Yes, he had turned back into a boy again. Thank goodness for small blessings. Straining his hearing he heard Kasumi talking with the teenage girls, even the one who - brrh - had kissed him, as a frog of all things. That wasn't exactly the kind of first kiss on the lips he would want to remember - but at least it was with a girl and it was, for better or for worse, unforgettable.

Kasumi was sitting next to him, the same vapid smile on her face as before. On her lap she had his gi she had pulled out from her bag.

Ranma took a full blast of Kasumi's radiant smile in his face when she saw him back awake. 'She ain't ugly,' he thought.

He peeked under the quilt he was lying under to see that he hadn't been dressed. Nope. Kasumi was still sitting beside him without any indication that she'd be moving anywhere.

"Uh.. Kasumi, could ya let me get dressed alone?"

Ranma didn't notice her pout as she stood up and walked out of the room.

* * *

When Kasumi stepped out of the small room Ranma was in, Makoto was still trying to keep Usagi out of Rei's reach. Seeing the audience Rei forced herself to calm down.

"You should come by another time when my grandpa is here, maybe he can be of more help," Rei told Kasumi. She honestly hadn't learned all that much about curses yet. Silently she wondered where exactly her grandpa had run off this time... or after whom.

At this point, Ranma stepped out dressed in his gi. Usagi, Rei and Makoto saw how Kasumi looked at him. The latter two had been admiring the physique at the older boy before Kasumi put him under covers while the former was reminded of her betrayal of Tuxedo Kamen.

Makoto wondered, now that she saw him in his gi, if he might be as good a martial artist as her old sempai. Maybe he might be her new one? Then she shook her head to clear off the thought. If Kasumi was the princess and she was to Makoto's opinion clearly smitten with him, she was hardly in position to take him for herself. Besides... a frog?

* * *

The war council of two had convened in Nabiki's room and battle plans were drawn. Refreshments were served on the intermission; more specifically, refreshments bought from the nearby general store.

The first plan was the direct approach. Akane had decided to challenge Ranma to a fight for the right to stay. She was the best martial artist in the region, and no cocky boy would take her that title away, as the heir of the Tendo school and the best martial artist in Nerima her victory would be guaranteed.

The other half of the council was also making plans, but with sneakier approach. Although as tempting as it was, flushing him down the toilet was not an option, especially if he had managed to win Akane. No, Nabiki would have to do more research on the frogman before she could formulate her own plans in detail. Besides, she had yet to find the definitive way to peruse his wallet to her ends. The least she could do now was to get his father to enroll him in the same school as Akane and her to give her plenty of money-making opportunities.

Their sister would be freed.

* * *

Genma and Soun were sitting in the family room sipping sake. Genma was in his uncursed form because now he needed only half the sake for the same effect.

"It looks like the families are going to be joined, Genma."

"But not the schools, Soun. Not the schools."

"Should we try to switch the engagement over to Akane? Kasumi hasn't ever been interested in martial arts before."

Of course, one key factor not voiced here was that Kasumi hadn't prepared the lunch before she went out to town with Ranma, leaving two men and two sisters on their own devices - and only one of them was eager to cook something to eat. Unfortunately, this one happened to be the one whose cookings were mostly inedible. This was not a particularly desirable event in the future for the two.

"More sake?" Soun asked and gestured towards the fourth, still unopened bottle.

"Please... I can still taste the food."

* * *

Upstairs, both Akane and Nabiki felt an unexplainable wave of nausea. And on an almost completely unrelated note, somewhere else the boulders blocking the entrance to a cave dislodged, permitting a small figure to crawl out of the cave.

* * *

The rain had abated, so for once Ranma was walking as a boy next to Kasumi. The two were heading for a train station to get back to Nerima and idly discussing this and that.

He took a look at the woman walking beside him. In Ranma's opinion, she wasn't a great mind. Her gait told him she wasn't a martial artist either, or not a good one in any case.

So why did he care how she felt? Did he? Pops had said that women were a distraction from the Art. But it was he who had arranged this engagement. Wouldn't be the first mistake he did... the nekoken, the Amazon village and the time he tried selling him as food after Jusenkyo coming first into his mind.

Kasumi took a look at Ranma's face, his brows scrunched in contemplation. The rumbling of his stomach brought another smile on her face. If they had had more money with them, they might've gone to a caf for a snack, but as it were, they had barely enough to take the train back to Nerima. "I'll make you something quick to eat once we get home," Kasumi told him, the smile not leaving her face.

Someone had once said that the quickest way to man's heart is through his stomach. For a true Saotome this was true twice as much. Whether she was a distraction or not, Ranma'd never turn down free food. 'Maybe this engagement thing isn't all that bad after all,' he mused.

Neither one noticed Makoto, who followed the two as they boarded the train.

* * *

The freshly forged bond between the two was set to test as soon as they stepped inside the Tendo household front yard. Trailing a hundred metres behind them, Makoto saw that this was their destination and probably their home - something Rei could've just as well asked the two - and turned back to the railway station. She still had homework to do for tomorrow's lessons, and she doubted she'd learn more without risking the chance of being discovered. The disguise pen would've worked wonders. Maybe Usagi had found it already and would bring it to school with her tomorrow.

"Ranma Saotome, for the right to court my sister, I challenge you!"

Thus spoke Akane, dressed up in her gi and ready to fight. Kasumi made a mental note to discuss this behaviour with Akane.

Genma and Soun whispered to each other. "Soun, even if Akane wins, we can always move the engagement over to her."

"Yes, she must've challenged Ranma so that she can have your boy for herself!"

Ranma grinned. He didn't expect Akane, a girl, to amount to much compared to him. But also from the honor standpoint he couldn't turn down the challenge. "I accept the challenge. The dojo, now?"

His grin was returned. "Yes, now," Akane replied and turned to move towards the dojo.

Kasumi gave an unflappable smile at Ranma. "I'll go start on the food and come watch the fight then," she told Ranma. This was the least she could do for her magical prince who prepared to fight the evil step... uh, just her sisters for the right to be with her. Nabiki got herself some water to drink before going to see the fight. 'This should be fun,' she thought.

Once inside the dojo the two duelists began stretching before their duel. The fathers stood off a bit to the side, talking in low tones and sparing a glance every few seconds at Ranma and Akane. Soon Nabiki arrived with her glass and saw the two scheming masters. 'Now what are they up to?' she wondered and tried sneaking closer to eavesdrop on them.

Before she got close enough to hear their whispering, Akane and Ranma both signalled they were ready to begin. The stage was set as the two took up positions on the floor.

"The fight is until the shoulders of either combatant hit the floor. Anything goes," Soun arbitrated. Genma signaled the fight to start.

Akane threw a tentative punch at Ranma, who sidestepped it and poked Akane on her forehead once with his forefinger.

Picking up her speed, Akane then shot a much faster jab at him.

"Aren't ya a slow one," he taunted.

A quick spin-kick and a series of punches didn't work any better for Akane as Ranma danced around them.

"A thick-thighed tomboy like ya can't ever hit me," the taunts continued.

She was losing her meager control on her anger. A leg sweep missed as Ranma leisurely jumped over it, and he dodged the elbow follow-up with ease. This play of Akane striking and Ranma dodging continued for a few minutes before Akane's temper got the best of her.

Furious, Akane threw a strong punch at him. A dodge and the dojo got the beginnings of a new window. The destruction didn't sit well with Nabiki at all; they didn't have enough money to waste on repairing the dojo as well. And if the fight so far was of any indication, Akane had no chance of winning. Well, since the match was anything goes after all...

_Splash._

Frog-Ranma fought his way out from the folds of his gi to see Nabiki stand in the sidelines, an empty glass on her hand and a wicked grin on her face.

Ranma was furious. He didn't like being made fun of, he didn't like losing, and he didn't like this. Things didn't look too good, though. He had begun to adopt Anything Goes to create Frog Fist style for this form, but he was far from finished with it. No matter, he would win, even if only for the sake of Kasumi's cooking. Even if he hadn't a taste of it yet, it couldn't be worse than what he and Pops had eaten on their trip.

"Ribbit!" he croaked and jumped at Akane head-on.

"Nabiki! That was not nice!" Kasumi, who had entered the dojo just to see Nabiki throw the water on Ranma, exclaimed. Nabiki started; Kasumi rarely, if ever, scolded anyone, let alone with a voice this strong. Maybe the fact that the kitchen was now a mess had a little to do with it.

This was also enough to distract Akane from the fight, who turned slightly away from the oncoming frog attack... just enough to make sure Ranma's jump ended up inside Akane's gi via the collar.

Akane tensed up, her face contorted in a rictus. Nabiki paled at the thought of what Akane might start doing now. Kasumi was not happy that her prince Valiant had jumped inside other women's clothing but hers, but didn't let this show outside.

"Gyyaaaaaaaagggh!"

She screamed and she jumped around waving her hands around, trying to keep the frog out of touch with her skin and her bra, and the frog jumped with her. The muffled croaks of near panic, meant to say "let me out of here", didn't serve to make her any calmer but only made her panic even more.

Ranma as well renewed his efforts twice as hard to get out of there as fast as possible, but whatever Akane was doing, was not helping him in the least. Eventually Akane hit the ground on her back as she lost her balance in her struggles, allowing Ranma to find his way out of Akane's gi through the left sleeve.

"The winner is Ranma Saotome," Soun declared. Akane launched herself up furiously whereas Ranma ran out of the dojo terrified. Kasumi picked up his gi and set out after him to get him to some hot water, leaving Genma and the rest of the Tendos to argue how the fight was resolved.

"There was no foul, the rules said anything goes," Genma stated. Akane was fuming. Had Genma had a rare, very rare flash of insight, he would've splashed himself with cold water and snuck away with the other half before making his next comment.

"And since the obvious reason behind this challenge was that you wanted to be the boy's fiancée as well, Soun and I decided to engage you as well to him -"

He didn't get any further before the Mallet of Pain struck him square on the head, dishing his both halves equal amount of hurt.

"Idiots!"

Nabiki tuned out the wailing of her father of her daughter hating her father-in-law. Then she let out a sigh of relief for not being included in the fiancée mess any more than she already was and moved out of the dojo. She'd have to be especially careful not to get into the same situation herself as Akane did.

* * *

Kasumi caught up on Ranma not far from the dojo, scooped him up and took him to the kitchen. She hadn't had the time to clean up the mess but to just put on some hot water for tea before she had left to watch the duel. Preferring his male form, she doused the water in the kettle on him.

In the kitchen Kasumi held the shivering Ranma, wondering aloud what exactly had gotten him this spooked up. 'Men do not cry,' rang in Ranma's head.

In the changing room, Akane was changing all of her clothing to something frog-Ranma hadn't touched and set down her kitty-print panties next to her bra with the same patterns. 'The gall of that pervert!' she fumed. Then she remembered she was now also engaged to him, which made her even angrier. A nice, long bath in the furo should help her calm down, if only a bit.

Just outside kitchen stood Nabiki and peeked inside the room, wondering what had affected Ranma so badly - and how she could use it to the benefit of the three sisters and her bank account. Tomorrow he'd have to go to school, and if the fathers followed her advice, he'd meet the Blue Thunder the first thing at the school yard. If he were smart, he'd hightail out of Nerima as soon as he could after that. Or preferably earlier.

* * *

_**AN:** I guess the first chapter didn't turn quite all of you away then and this chappy was a bit too tame and sane as well. Time to up the ante for the next chapters ;-) Oh, and if you didn't notice it already - I'm ditching also the canon order in which the characters were introduced._

_Thanks to those who have told my ideas are crazy - for this fic, I find that the highest recommendation there is._

_The idea of kitty-print undies I got from a Fruits Basket fanfic "Reflection"._


End file.
